Daddy Dates

I’m sure I’ve said before that I don’t have tons of dating experience. I chose not to buy into the casual dating atmosphere of high school–and was pretty school focused throughout college.

Now, I just love it when someone or something asks about my “favorite date” or “ideal date” or what I envision as the “perfect date.”

Uh, I don’t know.

Can’t say that I’ve dated around enough to get some sort of ideal vision in my head, divorced from WHO I’m enjoying something with, that is.

My most regular date has been my dad. We’ve been enjoying daddy-daughter dates off and on for five or so years. It started out as lunch dates, just having lunch once a week and talking. We worked for the same department of the University for a number of years and could both get reduced-rate meals at the cafeteria. It made for a nice little break for both of us–and didn’t cost either of us much at all.

Now that I’m employed by a different department and don’t have reduced-rate meals, we’ve varied things up a bit. Sometimes we still do lunch and we just pay full-price for my meal, but just as often we’ll choose something else.

About a month ago, we put in part of my dad’s garden together. Dad tilled, stretched the lines, and dug the furrows. I planted the corn. It was great. We just talked and enjoyed life together.

Last night, we took a leisurely little six mile bike ride and then settled in at my parent’s house to watch “Elizabeth”. On our bike ride, we talked life, blog reading, Microsoft’s market share, and the latest in science and news. Then we talked our way through the movie too, fast-forwarding when it included some gratuitous sex (WHY do they do that?), rewinding when we missed a line or which character was which, and occasionally pausing so we could make some popcorn or use the restroom. Of course, we had the subtitles on.

We have shared interests, we enjoy talking with one another. Our “dates” are generally pretty successful whatever we do.

Sure, sometimes our interests don’t align as perfectly. One night, we went to an art show that my cousin was showing a painting at. I enjoy art galleries, but it’s not really my dad’s favorite thing. What’s more, I really like to get up close to a piece of art and then move far away from it and then explore it from a dozen different angles. I like to wonder about the craftsmanship and the techniques and the tools. This show was pretty busy and I didn’t have opportunity to do that–and my art-viewing-style is rather solitary in the first place. My style, the atmosphere there, and my Dad’s apathy towards art combined to make that date less-than-ideal. But we made up for it by going to a coffee house and chatting over coffee (Dad) and a steamer (me).

So what is a perfect date?

I think it must depend on who you’re having the date with. The perfect date is one which allows both individuals to enjoy their shared interests and to relate to one another. And since everyone has different interests and relates in different ways, that “date” isn’t always the same for everyone.

In short, I don’t know what a “perfect date” looks like, but I do know what I enjoy in my “daddy dates”. I enjoy talking with my dad and sharing our common interests. And I’d imagine that’s what I’d want to do on a “real” date too.

What about you? What’s your vision of a “perfect date”? Have you ever done regular “daddy dates” or “friend dates” or something of the sort?