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Categories Thankful Thursday

Thankful Thursday: Reminders to be Thankful

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You know how you feel almost compelled to complain when something’s going poorly, but don’t even notice when the object of your complaint is removed?

That happened to me this week.

I’d been telling a friend about these awful dreams I’ve been having, how I’ve been waking up around 2 or so every morning and then falling back into a fitful sleep with terrible dreams. Last night, she asked me how my last few nights have been–and I realized with astonishment that they’d been…good.

No dreams. No nighttime waking and tossing and turning. Just sleep.

I’m so thankful for the reminder to be thankful for the blessings.

This week I’m thankful…

…for sweet sleep
It’s something I so often take for granted, even with the memory of poor sleep still burning in my head–but I am so thankful for the last several nights of good sleep.

…for time to read
It shames me to think how much time in the past year I’ve spent complaining about how I never have time for my own pleasures anymore. I complained that I was either working, keeping our house, or socializing (Ugh!) and rarely had any time to do any of the things I used to love to do: reading, blogging, crafting… But that hasn’t been so lately. I’ve had good opportunities to read lately, and it has been wonderful.

…for friends
It’s different, friendships here in Wichita versus the friendships I’ve had for the rest of my life. It’s generally more work now than it was. There are more variables now that I’m married, now when we’re juggling “old” and “new” connections. But I am so glad for the friendships I have here in Wichita. I’m thankful for Megan, asking me how I was sleeping. I’m thankful for Amie and Angie and a night of testimony and theology and books. I’m thankful for Rachel, reminding me that we should get together and play Seven Wonders (now that she and Kendall know how to play). I’m thankful for Dave and Casey and for the happy “accident” of sitting behind them in church.

…for a church that’s becoming home
It was very difficult for me, moving to Wichita and trying to assimilate into Daniel’s church. Even now, it’s difficult to articulate the reasons I didn’t quite fit–it’s a wonderful church with wonderful people, it just wasn’t my church. It was very difficult for us, beginning a church search. It made me despair that I’d become to consumer-minded, that I was expecting too much from a church. But now we’ve settled at a church, we’re starting to build relationships here–it’s becoming home. I am so thankful that God has brought us to this place.

Even as I look over this list of past complaints that God has graciously resolved, I wonder at my own theology. Am I wrong to thank God when He removes those pesky, bothersome complaints? Should I not be thanking Him for the pesky bothersome things? Should I not be thanking Him that in His sovereignty He has made life hard for me?

Yes. I should be thanking Him for making life hard.

And I should be thanking Him for making life easy.

For now, I will say with the psalmist:

“The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.”
~Psalm 16:5-6 (ESV)

Thank you, Lord, that you have drawn the lines in pleasant places for me. And thank you, Lord, that even when the lines appear unpleasant, I have YOU, my chosen portion, my cup, my beautiful inheritance. How can the lines not fall in pleasant places, when YOU are my lot?

Categories What's on Your Nightstand?

Nightstand (January 2014)

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I started the month strong on the blogging front, but quickly fell off that particular bandwagon. I am proud to announce, however, that I have NOT fallen off the reading wagon. I have enjoyed finishing several books over the past month.

This month, I read:

  • No Impact Man by Colin Beaver
    As a guilt-free (at least as far as environmental concerns go) conservative who nevertheless loves to avoid waste, I enjoyed “the adventures of guilty liberal who attempts to save the planet.” Beaver’s adventures in bread baking, cloth diapering, no packaging-shopping, light-turning-off, bicycle riding, and the like interested me to no end. Less interesting were “the discoveries he makes about himself and out way of life in the process.” See, Beaver is a Buddhist of sorts, who meditates regularly and quotes his feel-good Zen master over and over and over again ad nauseum. I’m going to guess that (of my regular readers) only the environmentally interested are going to be able to push through Beaver’s worldview to enjoy this book-so I won’t be at all surprised if the rest of you skip it.
  • Hope by Lori Copeland
    Standard Christian fiction. Nothing extraordinary, but still entertaining.
  • Calvin Coolidge by David Greenberg
    Daniel rather likes Coolidge, and I knew next to nothing about him, so I decided to read a biography. The biography the library offered is a part of Arthur Schlesinger, Jr.’s American Presidents series–and is written by someone who is clearly NOT a fan of Coolidge but who was trying to be fair. As such, this book was a rather dry and mostly measured account of Coolidge’s presidency. I’m glad I read it (since it gives me some background on the former president), but I wouldn’t really recommend it.
  • Good-bye Mr. Chips by James Hilton
    I watched a film by the same name several years back, but don’t remember anything of the plot. Reading this book, I realize there isn’t any plot, per se. What this book is is a charming character sketch of an old-fashioned British schoolmaster who ended up making his mark on generations of British boys–but whose own influence was mostly due to the now forgotten Mrs. Chips, who turned him from a solid but unmemorable master to a thoughtful and quirky “institution”. I greatly enjoyed this little easy-to-read novel.
  • More Sex is Safer Sex: The Unconventional Wisdom of Economics by Steven E. Landsburg
    I picked this book up because I like economics…and because the title really shocked me. Turned out, the “title chapter” (sort of a like a title song is only one of a diverse collection of songs, the title chapter is just one of the many explorations in this book) was just as shocking as the title was. Long story short, Landsburg argues that moderate levels of promiscuity would slow the spread of STDs like AIDS because it would increase the pool of uninfected individuals, making it easier to have sex without putting yourself at risk. While I have my doubts about his economic argument, I have far more doubts about the prudence of his advice based on both morals (when God says something’s sin, it’s best not to do it) and because I don’t think he takes into account the potential other effects of individuals trading abstinence or monogamy for promiscuity. But…the important thing was that it made me think. The whole book did. Often, my conclusions differed from Landsburg’s based on externalities I felt he didn’t appropriately address or based on assumptions he made (that I felt were incorrect) about what is good or what government is for, etc. But it was a very interesting book to think my way through. I am glad I read it.
  • Mesopotamia and the Fertile Crescent: 10,000 to 539 BC by John Malam
    A very nice children’s history of Mesopotamia. I noticed one Biblical error (stating that Nebuchadrezzar II’s ziggurat in Babylon was the Biblical “tower of Babel”, despite it being contemporary with the fall of Jerusalem rather than with the pre-patriarchal period), but in general, this is a well-written history of the early residents of the world’s oldest inhabited region.
  • The Blue Castle by L.M. Montgomery
    I read this for the L.M. Montgomery Challenge and Reading to Know Classic Book Club–and I’ll be writing up my full review sometime soon. Suffice to say that I enjoyed this book. I identified strongly and not at all with the main character–an almost-old-maid (that was me) who lived her entire life trying to make other people happy (that was not me) who stops caring what anyone thinks (that would be me) and becomes a… but I can’t tell you what she becomes, because that would be giving it away, right?

Books In Progress

Books In Progress

Books in Progress:

  • Rose Under Fire by Elizabeth Wein
    Because I am determined to sneak at least one book in for the Armchair Cybils. And because Amy’s review convinced me that it was well worth the read.
  • Laura Ingalls Wilder: A Biography by William Anderson
    Because I’m participating in Barbara’s Laura Ingalls Wilder Reading Challenge and wanted a biography of Laura that I hadn’t read yet.
  • One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp
    Because everyone was talking about it when it first came out, and now it’s no longer in the “new books” section at the library, so I get to keep it for longer than two weeks.
  • The 1920s edited by John F. Wukovits
    Because I wanted more context for Calvin Coolidge.
  • Discover your Inner Economist by Tyler Cowen
    Because I like economics and might as well read Dewey Decimal 330.(I do have a decent start.)
  • No More Sleepless Nights by Peter Hauri and Shirley Linde
    Because I’m not sleeping that well these days.
  • To-Do List by Sasha Cagen
    Because I love lists, and I like the idea of snooping through other peoples’ lists.
  • Sumer and the Sumerians by Harriet Crawford
    Because I’m researching for the children’s narrative history of the world I’m going to write someday (and have my sister-in-law illustrate) so that I can teach my children someday using it. (Duh!)

And, of course, there are plenty more in the wings for when I feel the need for some new material!

The Rest from the LibraryThe Rest from the Library
The Rest I have from the Library

Don’t forget to drop by 5 Minutes 4 Books to see what others are reading this month!

What's on Your Nightstand?

Categories Everyday Life, Following Christ

A Gracious God Gives

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We were getting ready to sit down to plan out our day of errands. I checked my phone to remind myself of what all we needed to do.

A text from Ruth asked me if I’d be interested in going to the Spice Merchant and the Nifty Nut House with her.

It was the second Saturday of the month, we were already planning on getting our coffee from the Spice Merchant – and I needed some cardamom pods.

We arranged a time to meet.

We explored, we purchased our respective items, we visited for many minutes leaned up against a shelf of Jordan almonds. After we said our goodbyes, Daniel and I got back in the car and decided it was late enough that we needed to prioritize getting recycling to the center before it closed. We’d hold off on the library, but should we drop by the post office before or after?

Might as well go by the post office. It’s on our way.

We get in, start our self service. Daniel pushes the international button. I correct him. Military addresses aren’t considered international. I fumble around, restart the process several times by accident. A postal employee locks the door to the service counter. No worries, we’ll be able to accomplish our business out here at the 24-hour kiosk.

Finally, I push all the right buttons and the screen announces: I’m sorry, we can not process APO/FPO addresses on this kiosk. Please go to the postal counter.

I look at Daniel. He looks at me. I look at the locked door. What do we do?

“I’m sorry” Daniel says.

The door opens and the postal employee asks us if we’d like in. We will be the last people given access to that room. All who come after us are told that the post office is closed.

On our way home, we remark how fortunate it was that we ended our conversation with Ruth when we did, that we chose to go to the past office when we did rather than later.

I muse that God was good to us by giving us what we wanted.

Daniel finishes the thought, “May He give us grace to accept when He is good to us by not giving us what we want.”

After visiting the library, I read the first chapter of one of the books I checked out: Ann Voskamp’s One Thousand Gifts .

She reflects on Eve’s thought in the garden: there must be more than this, something God’s not letting me in on. Eve was right, Voskamp writes. There was more. Pain, toil, sin, death. There was more, but it wasn’t good.

It reminds me anew how often I expect God to conform to my idea of good. I rail against him for not giving me the gift I want so badly. But then, occasionally, He opens my eyes to realize that withholding the supposed gift was a gift in itself.

A gracious God gives good gifts. Whatever He gives is good. Whatever He does not give, He does not give because it is not our greatest good.

Shall I accept good from the Lord and not adversity?

The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

May that ever be my cry, even as I anguish over a loss or sigh in longing for a much desired prize.

A gracious God always gives good gifts.

Categories Thankful Thursday

Thankful Friday (Because Thursday isn’t the only day on which one can be thankful)

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While new years often mean new starts, it’s lovely that one doesn’t have to start over completely. Instead, one can build on old habits, old routines, past success. I am so glad for those routines that are already there, those routines that sometimes get skipped for a day or two, but that are there to fall back on.

This week I’m thankful…

…for daily laundry
I do laundry every day (actually, 4-5 days per week), which somehow means that I never get exhausted by laundry. How is this? Every morning I put a load of laundry in after our showers. I switch it to the dryer at lunch (and, for most of the laundry, hang it after it tumbles 20 minutes). That evening (if it tumbles dry) or the next day (if it hangs), I’ll fold and put away the load and be done. This means that while I do laundry every day, I never spend more than 15 minutes on any given part of it–and if I miss a step somewhere (or even a whole day or two or three) it’s easy to get back on track.

…for shower squeegees
I’m not fantastic about cleaning the bathroom, but we do have a routine of squeegeeing the shower surround after our morning shower. This means that we don’t have the water spots and soap scum build up that often accompanies an unattended shower. That way, when I DO get around to cleaning the shower, it doesn’t take much to get it sparkling.

…for morning coffee
Daniel makes coffee every morning. We turn the pot on right before our shower and Daniel pours mine into a mug (for drinking right away) and his into a thermos (for keeping him awake in the midmorning at work) right after we’re done. That way, I can sit right down for breakfast with hot coffee and a book (or catching up on blog reading with Feedly.)

…for Daniel’s developing routine
Not long after we got married, Daniel asked what he can do around the house to help me out. I racked my brain for answers and finally arrived at washing dishes (it’s not that there aren’t other things that need to be done, but I didn’t want to turn them over to Daniel lest he disrupt my systems. Sigh. I can be such a control freak sometimes.) During school, when homework and classes were taking a lot of his free time, I often ended up beating him to them. But for the last few weeks he’s been chastising me if I do the dishes. That’s his job, he’ll say. And (almost) every night, he runs the sinks full and does a load of dishes – leaving me time to 1) do those other household tasks that I’m not willing to give him and 2) be lazy (like last night, when I read ten glorious chapters of The Blue Castle while he buttoned up the house for the evening.)

…for my lifeline
Every morning, I roll over, take my temperature and my levothyroxine, and grab my lifeline. I pull up the the OliveTree app on my phone and read the day’s reading. The words of Scripture wash over me. Sometimes I discover something profound, sometimes I gasp in the sweetness of a particular passage. More often, I just read, chew on, digest the word of God – knowing that whether I feel it or not, it is nourishment to my soul.

Routines are glorious things, and I’m so glad for the blessing of routines that ease my days, lighten my loads, and nourish my soul. May my regular response to the daily routines be thankfulness to the God who gives me each new day, each new opportunity to do the same old things.

From today’s lifeline:

“I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart;
I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.
I will be glad and exult in you;
I will sing praise to your name, O Most High.”
~Psalm 9:1-2 (ESV)

Categories 2014, B3RD, Family & Friends

Freezing your bum off and other weight loss strategies

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I’m freezing my bum off.

You’ve heard the phrase, right?

But what exactly does it mean? Is it supposed to be a reference to frostbite, a condition in which one literally freezes off parts of one’s body?

Probably not. My bet is that it has no grounding in thought.

It’s one of those things like “knocked my socks off”, silly and meaningless.

But imagine that you could actually freeze your bum off, like you would freeze off a wart. Imagine a simple outpatient procedure in which a doctor delicately freeze’s ones bum and then shaves it off like one whittles a piece of wood.

I’m sure that would be a popular procedure.

Alternately, imagine you could kiss a belly and make it go away–like you kiss a boo-boo to make it go away.

Now that would be a popular procedure.

Instead, we’re left with a much less glamorous and much more labor-intense process: learning to alter our behavior.

My marriage to Daniel has altered his behavior in a way that has not been friendly to his waistline. I’ve disrupted his schedule such that his once-regular runs have become a thing of the past and his once uber-low-calorie lunches (of lettuce salad) have turned to scrumptious (not-quite-so-low-calorie) leftovers.

So, in an effort to be a good wife this year and to support Daniel’s weight control efforts, I’ve decided to change MY behavior.

Among my Tier 1 objectives? Be a good wife.

Goals to earn points include running with Daniel (more points for longer spurts of running) and preparing more vegetables.

I can’t freeze Daniel’s bum off. Nor can I kiss his belly and make it go away. But I can help to make our home an environment that is more friendly to his goals.

For now, that’s preparing two vegetables instead of one with each meal–which means the overall calories of a plate full of food goes down without depriving him of food (a la Volumetrics and MyPlate.)

It’s dishing up our plates in the kitchen and putting away the next day’s lunches simultaneously–meaning we don’t keep eating just because the food is there on the table.

It’s using those divided tupperware for Daniel’s lunches, so he has a vegetable along with the main dish.

It’s keeping the fruit bowl stocked with fruit that Daniel can take to work for snacks instead of relying on the vending machine for when he can’t concentrate due to low blood sugars.

And it’s getting myself fit so I can run with him. Sigh.

Freezing his bum off would be easier than THAT.

Just to clarify: I have NOT made a goal to change my husband this year. Rather, I value him and his goal of a healthy weight and want to support him in this. These changes are NOT things that I am imposing upon him, but things we have discussed and have determined to be ways that I can help him reach his goals.

Categories Uncategorized

Crazy Car Lady

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I was trying to figure out what the gal in the car in front of me was doing today.

My best guesses?

Either she was a cell-phone driver who communicates entirely by sign language
or she was a charismatic getting some prayer time in.

I’m not gonna judge. I’ve been known to do some pretty crazy things while driving.

Still, I really wish I knew what had her hands moving with such animated gestures.

Have you ever seen someone doing something unusual while driving and wondered what exactly they were up to? What’s the craziest thing you’ve done while driving?

Categories Homemaking

Resolved: To have people over more often so our house will stay clean

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It’s not that our house is particularly messy–

But who am I kidding?

Our house is pretty messy.

What I’m trying to say is that we don’t live in squalor.

Almost every day, we eat homemade meals prepared and served on clean dishes. Every morning, we pull clean clothes from our closets and dresser drawers. Every night, we pull down the covers on a made bed and slip between sheets that haven’t been slept on for more than a week.

But our home bears the impact of daily living, and neither Daniel nor I are the neatest people in the world.

We have stacks of books and magazines on our nightstands, stacks of mail and packaging stacked on our table, and stacks of dirty dishes next to our sink. The living room couches are strewn with unfolded blankets, the floor beneath them strewn with shoes left behind where I took them off after I got home from work, the table beside them strewn with used mugs from the tea I drank with my books in the evenings.

And because there are piles of stuff all over the surfaces and floors, surfaces are rarely dusted and floors rarely swept. Which means our house is a mess.

While I have grandiose dreams of a household system to keep the house always spotless, our actual housecleaning system goes like this:

1) Invite someone over for dinner
2) Spend the day before eliminating piles and cleaning underneath them
3) Have people over for dinner
4) Let the dishes from having people over start the next pile of uncleanliness, which continues to grow until…
5) We invite someone over for dinner again

That’s not to say that I’m not working on establishing habits to control the clutter and uncleanliness. But we are also trying to make a habit of inviting people over more often–at least in part so we can keep the house clean.

Categories Family & Friends

Ooey-Gooey, Lovey-Dovey Stuff

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As I was reading through my Facebook newsfeed (well, actually, reading notifications from my sisters-in-law), I realized an interesting phenomenon:

My sisters-in-law post ooey-gooey, lovey-dovey stuff about their children ALL the time.

And people LIKE it.

*I* like it.

An adorable picture of Little Sis, accompanied by the text “Nothing is sweeter than ending the day with baby snuggles” gets 5 likes (as of now).

I can imagine the kind of reactions I’d get if I posted a picture of my (adorable) husband, accompanied by the text “Nothing is sweeter than ending the day with hubby snuggles.”

If I got likes, they’d be in the “you’re so silly” category. I’d probably be more likely to get “Eeww” or “Get a room” in response.

Why is it that we can say all sorts of ooey-gooey, lovey-dovey stuff about babies and no one blinks an eye, but if we were to act as obsessed with our husbands as we are with our children we’d be weirdos?

I don’t really have any answer to that question, nor do I really need an answer to that question (although you’re more than welcome to give your own theories)–but it was a thought I had.

Categories Thankful Thursday

Thankful Thursday: A New Year

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Come every new year, I can’t help but think of Anne’s comment that “Tomorrow is a new day – with no mistakes in it.”

Undoubtedly, I have already made myriads of mistakes in this New Year. But there is a sense in which a New Year offers a new start-an opportunity to figuratively reset the balance, to not be behind anymore, to start new things.

This week I’m thankful…

…for A “Gold Membership” at the library
Wichita’s public library charges $0.25 for holds – unless you’re a gold card carrier. In that case, you can hold for free. I took advantage of my new gold card status to nab a copy of L.M. Montgomery’s The Blue Castle – and my husband was so kind as to pick it up for me before the library closed on New Year’s Eve. So I’m all set to join in with the Lucy Maud Montgomery Reading Challenge and Reading to Know Classic Book Club this year. Yipee!

…for A partner in reading
Sometime last month, Daniel asked me if I would finish the Hunger Games trilogy and if I would please also read Orson Scott Card’s Ender’s Game so he could show me the movies. I dutifully read Ender’s Game (which was far from a trial), and will get to the rest of the Hunger Games sometime here :-) Daniel also asked me if there were any books I particularly wanted him to read. I didn’t have any in particular – and told him so. But yesterday, as I dramatically announced that “my life is a perfect graveyard of buried hopes” (not to worry – this was silliness, not depression, talking), I realized that there was one series I’d at least like him to be familiar with. I said maybe he should watch the movies with me. Daniel asked why he shouldn’t just read the books? He pooh-poohed my suggestion that he might find them too girly and got started right off. “Is this whole series this funny?” he asked me after the first chapter. It’s nice to have a partner in reading.

…for a week with our families
I managed to get the entire week of Christmas off work so Daniel and I headed up to Lincoln for a relaxing Christmas with our families. It was wonderful to veg with our families while working on last minute Christmas presents for the kids (Debbie–Mom and Dad have presents for the girls that they’re going to bring up when they come.) There weren’t as many people home for the holidays as at other times, but I think that ended up making the time we had more restful and allowed for better quality time with the people who were there.

…for coming home
As wonderful as it was to spend time with our families, it was wonderful to return home, to sleep in our own bed, to select clothing from my entire closet. This time was especially nice because I got New Year’s Day off as well – so I could recover from being gone instead of having to jump back into work routines with both feet.

…for the first project of the New Year completed
Since New Year “resets” the balance, I’m calling redoing the silicone seams in our tub a “+1” instead of a long overdue project. We’d initially talked of doing it before we got married (In fact, Daniel may have said something like “I have to get that silicone redone before you can bathe in that tub.”) But, the project kept getting put off for one reason or another. We needed some backer rod to fill the large gap. We needed to remove the old mildewed silicone (a much larger task than we’d initially thought). We needed to leave it a while before we could use the shower again (which meant it needed to be sometime when we could take the task from start to finish without showering-it turned out being around 48 hours.) Daniel’s back went out of whack. But we finally got it done–and it looks great! (Also, the backer rod means there’s no gap to harbor moisture and it’s much more easily cleanable – which means we may be able to kick the mildew once and for all.)

…for plans for quilting get-togethers
It was a quick Facebook exchange. She said I needed to move back to Lincoln so we could quilt together again. I suggested a quilting weekend sometime. My sister suggested a day a couple weeks out. I vetoed that (since I already have been to Lincoln twice in the last two months) and suggested another weekend, a couple months out. My sister confirmed that’d work. My quilting-buddy-turned-sister-in-law confirmed that’d work. I added it to my calendar. It’s nice to already have plans for the next time with the girls.

Last year was a wonderful year, a hard year, a year of many changes. I don’t know what this next year will bring. It will likely have joys and sorrows and changes. But I do have certainty for this New Year. I know that God will be faithful, that He will reveal Himself still more, that He will conform me into His image. So I am excited and thankful for this newest year God has given us.

May He be glorified in this New Year.

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
“therefore I will hope in him.””
~Lamentations 3:22-24 (ESV)

Categories 2014

2014 Goal Game

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Being goal oriented is one of my greatest strengths. It means I get a lot accomplished, I have focus, and I am less likely to waste time.

Being goal oriented is one of my greatest weaknesses. It means I can lose track of relationships, I forget to take care of my needs, and I get upset with myself for not accomplishing everything I set out to do.

The last item, in particular, frustrates my husband. When I started thinking what my goals would be for 2014, I asked him what he thought of my proposed goals. He told me he was fine with me working on any of the above, but reminded me that failing to complete the list of goals I’d suggested does NOT mean that I’m a failure. He wanted me to start out not too committed to accomplishment at all costs.

I acknowledged his concerns and mentioned how I’d already been tiering the goals in my mind – these certain ones were very important to me, the other ones not so much.

Hearing me explain this, he suggested that my goals sounded a little like a game – with different levels of achievement.

The seed that he planted took root and I began gamifying my 2014 goals.

I ended up with three tiers of broad objectives. Tier one objectives are most important to me (example: establish a church home). Tier 2 objectives are important, but less so (example: make home improvements). Tier 3 objectives are things that I think would be nice or fun but that I’m not super committed to accomplishing (example: cook recipes from the One – Pot cookbook I own).

Within each broad objective, I have a number of more qualitative goals that are then ranked according to difficulty. I have platinum goals, gold goals, silver goals, and bronze goals. Each type of goal gives a different number of points. Platinum goals are worth 4 points, Gold are worth 3, silver 2, and bronze 1 – except that those values are cubed for Tier 1 goals and squared for Tier 2.

In this way, I have a flexible list of things is like to accomplish and a way to pat myself on the back for accomplishing them – but no easy way to get upset with myself for NOT accomplishing them. It’s genius really.

I’m geared up and ready to play.